Download and read online The Relationship Cure in PDF and EPUB A groundbreaking, practical program for transforming troubled relationships into positive ones “This is the best book on relationships I have ever read. . . . John Gottman has decoded the subtle secrets that can either enrich or destroy the quality of our ties with others.” Daniel B. Wile, Ph.D., author of After the Fight: Using Your Disagreements to Build a Stronger Relationship “John Gottman is our leading explorer of the inner world of relationships. In The Relationship Cure, he has found gold once again.”William J. Doherty, Ph.D., author of Take Back Your Marriage: Sticking Together in a World That Pulls Us Apart “When he says his five steps will help you build better connections with the people you care about, you know that they have been demonstrated to work.” E. Mavis Heatherington, Ph.D., professor of psychology, University of Virginia From the country’s foremost relationship expert and New York Times bestselling author Dr. John M. Gottman comes a powerful, simple five-step program, based on twenty years of innovative research, for greatly improving all of the relationships in your life—with spouses and lovers, children, siblings, and even your colleagues at work. In The Relationship Cure, Dr. Gottman: * Reveals the key elements of healthy relationships, emphasizing the importance of what he calls “emotional connection” * Introduces the powerful new concept of the emotional “bid,” the fundamental unit of emotional connection * Provides remarkably empowering tools for improving the way you bid for emotional connection and how you respond to others’ bids
Download and read online The Relationship Cure in PDF and EPUB One of the nation's top relationship experts outlines his revolutionary new five-step program for repairing damaged relationships between spouses, lovers, co-workers, and family members. By the author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Reprint. 40,000 first printing.
Download and read online The Relationship Cure in PDF and EPUB One of the nation's top relationship doctors outlines his program for repairing damaged relationships between spouses, lovers, co-workers, and family members.
Download and read online The Relationship Cure in PDF and EPUB Leading relationship expert and bestselling author Dr. John Gottman, who has won numerous awards for his groundbreaking research, presents a revolutionary five-step program for repairing troubled relationships - with spouses and lovers, children and other family members, friends, and even your boss or colleagues at work. Drawing on a host of powerful new studies, as well as his 29 years of analyzing relationships and conducting relationship therapy, Gottman provides the tools you need to make your relationships thrive. Introducing the empowering concept of the "emotional bid," which he calls the fundamental unit of emotional connection, Gottman shows that all good relationships are built through a process of making and receiving successful bids. These bids range from such subtle gestures as a quick question, a look, or a comment to the most probing and intimate ways we communicate. Gottman's research reveals that people in happy relationships make bidding and responding to bids a high priority in their lives, and he has discovered the fascinating secrets behind mastering the bidding process. Those who do so tend to "turn toward" bids from others, whereas most problems in relationships stem from either "turning away" or "turning against" bids for connection. Gottman's simple yet life-transforming five-step program, packed with fascinating questionnaires and exercises developed in his therapy, shows readers how to become master bidders by effectively turning toward others. Presenting fascinating examples of bidding, he teaches readers how to assess their strengths and weaknesses in bidding, as well as those of the important people in their lives, and how to improve where necessary. He draws on the latest research to show readers how their brain's unique emotional command systems, as well as their emotional heritage - their upbringing, life experiences, and enduring vulnerabilities - affect how they make and receive bids, and how to make adjustments. He then introduces a set of enjoyable and remarkably effective ways to deepen connections by finding shared meaning and honoring one another's dreams. The final chapter offers specially tailored programs for life's most important relationships: with lovers or spouses, children, adult siblings, friends, and coworkers. The Relationship Cure offers a simple but profound program that will fundamentally transform the quality of all of the relationships in your life.
Download and read online The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work in PDF and EPUB Just as Masters and Johnson were pioneers in the study of human sexuality, so Dr. John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage. As a professor of psychology at the University of Washington and the founder and director of the Seattle Marital and Family Institute, he has studied the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over the course of many years. His findings, and his heavily attended workshops, have already turned around thousands of faltering marriages. This book is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward in their approach, yet profound in their effect, these principles teach partners new and startling strategies for making their marriage work. Gottman helps couples focus on each other, on paying attention to the small day-to-day moments that, strung together, make up the heart and soul of any relationship. Being thoughtful about ordinary matters provides spouses with a solid foundation for resolving conflict when it does occur and finding strategies for living with those issues that cannot be resolved. Packed with questionnaires and exercises whose effectiveness has been proven in Dr. Gottman's workshops, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the result of Dr. John Gottman's many years of closely observing thousands of marriages. This kind of longitudinal research has never been done before. Based on his findings, he has culled seven principles essential to the success of any marriage. Maintain a love map. Foster fondness and admiration. Turn toward instead of away. Accept influence. Solve solvable conflicts. Cope with conflicts you can't resolve. Create shared meaning. Dr. Gottman's unique questionnaires and exercises will guide couples on the road to revitalizing their marriage, or making a strong one even better.
Download and read online Cure in PDF and EPUB THE NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER SHORTLISTED FOR THE ROYAL SOCIETY SCIENCE BOOK PRIZE LONGLISTED FOR THE WELLCOME PRIZE ALL IN THE MIND? - Can meditation fend off dementia? - Can the smell of lavender affect the immune system? - Can your thoughts ease physical pain? In Cure, award-winning science writer Jo Marchant travels the world to meet the physicians, patients and researchers on the cutting edge of mind-body medicine. Asking how the brain can heal the body and how we can all make changes to keep ourselves healthier.
Download and read online The Normal Bar in PDF and EPUB Based on data obtained from nearly 100,000 respondents, here is the ultimate resource for anyone who wants to learn the relationship-tested ways couples can achieve satisfaction and contentment in areas such as communication, sex, affection, and financial cooperation. What constitutes “normal” behavior among happy couples? What steps you should take if that “normal” is one you want to strive for? To help answer those questions, wellness entrepreneur Chrisanna Northrup teamed with two of America’s top sociologists, Yale Ph.D. Pepper Schwartz and Harvard Ph.D. James Witte, to design a unique interactive survey that would draw feedback from around the world. What has resulted is the clearest picture yet of how well couples are communicating, romancing each other, satisfying each other in the bedroom, sharing financial responsibilities, and staying faithful – or not. Since the Normal Bar survey methodology sorts for age and gender, racial and geographic differences and sexual preferences, the authors are able to reveal , for example, what happens to passion as we grow older, which gender wants what when it comes to sex, the factors that spur marital combat, how kids figure in, how being gay or bisexual turns out to be both different and the same, and –regardless of background -- the tiny habits that drive partners absolutely batty. The book is dense with revelations, from the unexpected popularity of certain sexual positions, to the average number of times happy – and unhappy -- couples kiss, to the prevalence of lying, to the surprising loyalty most men and women feel for their partner (even when in a deteriorating relationship), to the vivid and idiosyncratic ways individuals of different ages, genders and nationalities describe their “ideal romantic evening.” Much more than a peek behind the relationship curtain, The Normal Bar offers readers an array of prescriptive tools that will help them establish a “new normal.” Mindful of what keeps couples stuck in ruts, the book’s authors suggest practical and life-changing ways to break cycles of disappointment and frustration.
Download and read online What Makes Love Last in PDF and EPUB The best-selling author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work lends scientific insights into how to build and maintain trust in committed relationships, sharing a formula for calculating a couple's loyalty level that takes into account a relationship's likely future and vulnerability to infidelity.
Download and read online The Science of Happily Ever After in PDF and EPUB Examines the science behind choosing a mate and reveals actionable tips for finding love, in an exploration that draws on research from such fields as demography, sociology, and psychology.
Download and read online The Science of Trust Emotional Attunement for Couples in PDF and EPUB An eminent therapist explains what makes couples compatible and how to sustain a happy marriage. For the past thirty-five years, John Gottman’s research has been internationally recognized for its unprecedented ability to precisely measure interactive processes in couples and to predict the long-term success or failure of relationships. In this groundbreaking book, he presents a new approach to understanding and changing couples: a fundamental social skill called “emotional attunement,” which describes a couple’s ability to fully process and move on from negative emotional events, ultimately creating a stronger relationship. Gottman draws from this longitudinal research and theory to show how emotional attunement can downregulate negative affect, help couples focus on positive traits and memories, and even help prevent domestic violence. He offers a detailed intervention devised to cultivate attunement, thereby helping couples connect, respect, and show affection. Emotional attunement is extended to tackle the subjects of flooding, the story we tell ourselves about our relationship, conflict, personality, changing relationships, and gender. Gottman also explains how to create emotional attunement when it is missing, to lay a foundation that will carry the relationship through difficult times. Gottman encourages couples to cultivate attunement through awareness, tolerance, understanding, non-defensive listening, and empathy. These qualities, he argues, inspire confidence in couples, and the sense that despite the inevitable struggles, the relationship is enduring and resilient. This book, an essential follow-up to his 1999 The Marriage Clinic, offers therapists, students, and researchers detailed intervention for working with couples, and offers couples a roadmap to a stronger future together.
Download and read online The Human Magnet Syndrome in PDF and EPUB "Born in the cauldron of personal experience of suffering and healing and honed through years of professional experience, this book will help anyone understand the attractors of love and consequent suffering. I recommend it to couples who are mystified by the depth and repitition of their pain and joy and to therapists whose destiny is to help them." ~ Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., co-author with Helen LaKelly Hunt of Making Marriage Simple: Transform the Relationship you Have Into the Relationship you Want Since the dawn of civilization, men and women have been magnetically and irresistibly drawn together into romantic relationships, not so much by what they see, feel and think, but more by invisible forces. When individuals with healthy emotional backgrounds meet, the irresistible “love force” creates a sustainable, reciprocal and stable relationship. Codependents and emotional manipulators are similarly enveloped in a seductive dreamlike state; however, it will later unfold into a painful “seesaw” of love, pain, hope and disappointment. The soul mate of the codependent’s dreams will become the emotional manipulator of their nightmares. Readers of the Human Magnet Syndrome will better understand why they, despite their dreams for true love, find themselves hopelessly and painfully in love with partners who hurt them. This book will guide and inspire both the layman and the professional.
Download and read online The Man s Guide to Women in PDF and EPUB
Results from world-renowned relationship expert John Gottman's famous Love Lab have proven an incredible truth: Men make or break relationships. Based on 40 years of research, The Man's Guide to Women unlocks the mystery of how to attract, satisfy, and succeed with a woman for a lifetime. For the first time ever, there is a science-based answer to the age-old question: What do women really want in a man?
Dr. Gottman, author of the New York Times bestseller The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, and his wife and collaborator, clinical psychologist Julie Schwartz Gottman, PhD, have pored over the research along with bestselling coauthors Douglas Abrams and Rachel Carlton Abrams, MD. Together, they have written this definitive guide for men, providing answers on everything from how to approach a woman and build a connection with her to how to truly satisfy her in bed and know when the relationship is on the right track. The Man's Guide to Women is a must-have playbook for how to play--and win--the game of love.
Download and read online The Fear Cure in PDF and EPUB Not many people in the medical world are talking about how being afraid can make us sick—but the truth is that fear, left untreated, becomes a serious risk factor for conditions from heart disease to diabetes to cancer. Now Lissa Rankin, M.D., explains why we need to heal ourselves from the fear that puts our health at risk and robs our lives of joy—and shows us how fear can ultimately cure us by opening our eyes to all that needs healing in our lives. Drawing on peer-reviewed studies and powerful true stories, The Fear Cure presents a breakthrough understanding of fear’s effects and charts a path back to wellness and wholeness on every level. We learn:How a fearful thought translates into physiological changes that predispose us to illnessHow to tell true fear (the kind that arises from a genuine threat) from false fear (which triggers stress responses that undermine health)How to tune in to the voice of courage inside—our “Inner Pilot Light”How to reshape our relationship to uncertainty so that it’s no longer something to dread, but a doorway to new possibilitiesWhat our fears can teach us about who we really are At the intersection of science and spirituality, The Fear Cure identifies the Four Fearful Assumptions that lie at the root of all fears—from the sense that we’re alone in the universe to the belief that we can’t handle losing what we love—and shifts them into Four Courage-Cultivating Truths that pave our way to not only physical well-being, but profound awakening. Using exercises from a wide range of mind-body practices and spiritual traditions, Dr. Rankin teaches us how to map our own courage-cultivating journey, write a personalized Prescription for Courage, and step into a more authentic life.
Download and read online The Brain Defense in PDF and EPUB Called “the best kind of nonfiction” by Michael Connelly, this riveting new book combines true crime, brain science, and courtroom drama. In 1991, the police were called to East 72nd St. in Manhattan, where a woman's body had fallen from a twelfth-story window. The woman’s husband, Herbert Weinstein, soon confessed to having hit and strangled his wife after an argument, then dropping her body out of their apartment window to make it look like a suicide. The 65-year-old Weinstein, a quiet, unassuming retired advertising executive, had no criminal record, no history of violent behavior—not even a short temper. How, then, to explain this horrific act? Journalist Kevin Davis uses the perplexing story of the Weinstein murder to present a riveting, deeply researched exploration of the intersection of neuroscience and criminal justice. Shortly after Weinstein was arrested, an MRI revealed a cyst the size of an orange on his brain’s frontal lobe, the part of the brain that governs judgment and impulse control. Weinstein’s lawyer seized on that discovery, arguing that the cyst had impaired Weinstein’s judgment and that he should not be held criminally responsible for the murder. It was the first case in the United States in which a judge allowed a scan showing a defendant’s brain activity to be admitted as evidence to support a claim of innocence. The Weinstein case marked the dawn of a new era in America's courtrooms, raising complex and often troubling questions about how we define responsibility and free will, how we view the purpose of punishment, and how strongly we are willing to bring scientific evidence to bear on moral questions. Davis brings to light not only the intricacies of the Weinstein case but also the broader history linking brain injuries and aberrant behavior, from the bizarre stories of Phineas Gage and Charles Whitman, perpetrator of the 1966 Texas Tower massacre, to the role that brain damage may play in violence carried out by football players and troubled veterans of America’s twenty-first century wars. The Weinstein case opened the door for a novel defense that continues to transform the legal system: Criminal lawyers are increasingly turning to neuroscience and introducing the effects of brain injuries—whether caused by trauma or by tumors, cancer, or drug or alcohol abuse—and arguing that such damage should be considered in determining guilt or innocence, the death penalty or years behind bars. As he takes stock of the past, present and future of neuroscience in the courts, Davis offers a powerful account of its potential and its hazards. Thought-provoking and brilliantly crafted, The Brain Defense marries a murder mystery complete with colorful characters and courtroom drama with a sophisticated discussion of how our legal system has changed—and must continue to change—as we broaden our understanding of the human mind.
Download and read online The Knowledge Illusion in PDF and EPUB “The Knowledge Illusion is filled with insights on how we should deal with our individual ignorance and collective wisdom.” —Steven Pinker We all think we know more than we actually do. Humans have built hugely complex societies and technologies, but most of us don’t even know how a pen or a toilet works. How have we achieved so much despite understanding so little? Cognitive scientists Steven Sloman and Philip Fernbach argue that we survive and thrive despite our mental shortcomings because we live in a rich community of knowledge. The key to our intelligence lies in the people and things around us. We’re constantly drawing on information and expertise stored outside our heads: in our bodies, our environment, our possessions, and the community with which we interact—and usually we don’t even realize we’re doing it. The human mind is both brilliant and pathetic. We have mastered fire, created democratic institutions, stood on the moon, and sequenced our genome. And yet each of us is error prone, sometimes irrational, and often ignorant. The fundamentally communal nature of intelligence and knowledge explains why we often assume we know more than we really do, why political opinions and false beliefs are so hard to change, and why individually oriented approaches to education and management frequently fail. But our collaborative minds also enable us to do amazing things. This book contends that true genius can be found in the ways we create intelligence using the world around us.