Download and read online Go the Fuck to Sleep in PDF and EPUB Go the Fuck to Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate and refreshingly honest, it captures the familiar and unspoken tribulations of putting your child to bed for the night. Colourfully illustrated and hilariously funny, this is a breath of fresh air for parents new, old, and expectant*. (*You should probably not read this to your children.)
Download and read online Go the Fuck to Sleep in PDF and EPUB The #1 New York Times best-seller for parents who live in the real world.
Download and read online Go the Fuck to Sleep in PDF and EPUB "Nothing has driven home a certain truth about my generation, which is approaching the apex of its childbearing years, quite like this." --The New Yorker "A parenting zeitgeist" --Washington Post "A hilarious take on that age-old problem: getting the beloved child to go to sleep." --National Public Radio "A new Bible for weary parents" --New York Times "Resonates powerfully with almost everyone" --Boston Globe "Go the F*** to Sleep challenges stereotypes, opens up prototypes, and acknowledges that shared sense of failure that comes to all parents who weary of ever getting their darling(s) to sleep and briefly resuming the illusion of a life of their own." --Midwest Book Review Go the F*** to Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don't always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, California Book Award-winning author Adam Mansbach's verses perfectly capture the familiar--and unspoken--tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. In the process, they open up a conversation about parenting, granting us permission to admit our frustrations, and laugh at their absurdity. With illustrations by Ricardo Cortes, Go the F*** to Sleep is beautiful, subversive, and pants-wettingly funny--a book for parents new, old, and expectant. You probably should not read it to your children. Seriously, Just Go to Sleep, a children's book inspired by Go the F*** to Sleep and appropriate for kids of all ages, is forthcoming from Akashic Books in April 2012 and available NOW for pre-order.
Download and read online You Have to Fucking Eat in PDF and EPUB From the author of the international best seller GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP comes a book about the other great parental frustration: getting your little angel to eat something that even vaguely resembles a normal meal. Profane, loving and deeply cathartic, You Have to Fucking Eat breaks the code of child-rearing silence, giving mums and dads new, old, grand- and expectant a much-needed chance to laugh about a universal problem. You probably shouldn't read it to your children.
Download and read online Seriously Just Go to Sleep in PDF and EPUB "Now there's a version, complete with more of the gorgeous, yet weirdly subversive illustrations. The best part? It's still funny. The rhythms, the plodding rhymes, the illustrations, the clever play on the overused trope of the world at bedtime -- they all work together to take Seriously, Just Go to Sleep beyond parody and into the realm where good children's books belong: things that parents, and children, can honestly come to from different places and enjoy together. I can imagine reading Seriously, Go to Sleep nightly, and even to the point where you're begging the child to choose something else (the ultimate compliment for a picture book) and yet still finding something to enjoy. It captures a different 'zeitgeist' of modern parenting." --New York Times "From the team that touched off the irreverent humor trend Go the F**k to Sleep, author Adam Mansbach and illustrator Ricardo Cortes, comes a new kid-friendly version of their instant comic classic. Seriously, Just Go to Sleep brings children in on the joke, helping them understand their own tactics and why their parents just want them to go . . . to sleep." --Publishers Weekly Critical success for the original Go the F*** to Sleep, a #1 best seller at: New York Times, Amazon.com, Wall Street Journal, Publishers Weekly, and many more! Seriously, Just Go to Sleep is the G-rated, traditional-sized, children's version of the book every parent has been talking about. Go the F*** to Sleep, the picture book for adults, became a cultural sensation by striking a universal chord for parents. Now, Adam Mansbach and Ricardo Cortés reunite with Seriously, Just Go to Sleep, inviting the children themselves in on the joke. As parents know, kids are well aware of how difficult they can be at bedtime. With Cortés's updated illustrations (including a cameo appearance by Samuel L. Jackson, who narrated the audio book version of Go the F*** to Sleep) and Mansbach's new child-appropriate narrative, the book allows kids to recognize their tactics, giggle at their own mischievousness, and empathize with their parents' struggles--a perspective most children's books don't capture. Most importantly, it provides a common ground for children and their parents to talk about one of the most stressful aspects of parenting. Seriously, Just Go to Sleep came to be when Mansbach read a highly censored rendition of the original book to his three-year-old daughter, and she recognized herself as the culprit and was delighted. "We were getting a lot of feedback from parents, saying that their kids loved the book--read in an altered form--because they recognized themselves in the character of the mischievous kid who's winning the bedtime battle, and thought it was hilarious. So we figured we’d do a companion volume that lets kids in on the fun."
Download and read online Go de Rass to Sleep in PDF and EPUB Named one of the 20 Greatest New Father's Day Gifts by Advocate.com! "No matter what the country or the language, parents all over the world--loving, frustrated, exhausted parents--know what Adam Mansbach means. Since 2011, his comically obscene picture book has sold more than 1.5 million copies in dozens of languages from Afrikaans to Japanese to Nynorsk. And later this year, his little book will venture into new territory with a Jamaican patois translation: 'Go de R–s to Sleep.'" --The Washington Post/Style Blog "This version of Adam Mansbach's profane, affectionate, and radically honest book will remind whole new audiences about the absurdities of parenting. Just don't read it to the kids." --Advocate.com, The 20 Greatest New Father's Day Gifts Praise for Go the Fuck to Sleep: "A new Bible for weary parents." --New York Times "Incredibly appealing." --NPR "A parenting zeitgeist...A phenomenon that has stunned the publishing world and may just redefine the modern ‘parenting’ market." --Washington Post "Delightfully obscene." --Newsweek "Nothing has driven home a certain truth about my generation, which is approaching the apex of its childbearing years, quite like this deranged book." --New Yorker The best-selling Go the F*** to Sleep has been translated into over thirty languages worldwide. Now it is finally translated for Jamaican and other Caribbean parents of the world. Given how many West Indians live in the US and Canada, the market for this book should be broad, but focused mainly on areas with a large Caribbean community. Go de Rass to Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, California Book Award–winning author Adam Mansbach's verses perfectly capture the familiar--and unspoken--tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. In the process, they open up a conversation about parenting, granting us permission to admit our frustrations, and laugh at their absurdity. With illustrations by Ricardo Cortés, Go de Rass to Sleep is beautiful, subversive, and pants-wettingly funny--a book for parents new, old, and expectant. You probably should not read it to your children.
Download and read online How to Ruin Everything in PDF and EPUB A New York Times Bestseller "Funny, subversive, and able to excavate such brutally honest sentences that you find yourself nodding your head in wonder and recognition." —Lin-Manuel Miranda, composer and lyricist of In the Heights and Hamilton: An American Musical Are you a sensible, universally competent individual? Are you tired of the crushing monotony of leaping gracefully from one lily pad of success to the next? Are you sick of doing everything right? In this brutally honest and humorous debut, musician and artist George Watsky chronicles the small triumphs over humiliation that make life bearable and how he has come to accept defeat as necessary to personal progress. The essays in How to Ruin Everything range from the absurd (how he became an international ivory smuggler) to the comical (his middle-school rap battle dominance) to the revelatory (his experiences with epilepsy), yet all are delivered with the type of linguistic dexterity and self-awareness that has won Watsky devoted fans across the globe. Alternately ribald and emotionally resonant, How to Ruin Everything announces a versatile writer with a promising career ahead. From the Trade Paperback edition.
Download and read online A Child s First Book of Trump in PDF and EPUB What do you do when you spot a wild Trump in the election season? New York Times bestselling author and comedian Michael Ian Black has some sage advice for children (and all the rest of us who are scratching our heads in disbelief) in this perfectly timely parody picture book intended for adults that would be hysterical if it wasn’t so true. The beasty is called an American Trump. Its skin is bright orange, its figure is plump. Its fur so complex you might get enveloped. Its hands though are, sadly, underdeveloped. The Trump is a curious creature, very often spotted in the wild, but confounding to our youngest citizens. A business mogul, reality TV host, and now…political candidate? Kids (and let’s be honest many adults) might have difficulty discerning just what this thing that’s been dominating news coverage this election cycle is. Could he actually be real? Are those…words coming out of his mouth? Why are his hands so tiny? And perhaps most importantly, what on earth do you do when you encounter an American Trump? With his signature wit and a classic picture book style, comedian Michael Ian Black introduces those unfamiliar with the Americus Trumpus to his distinguishing features and his mystifying campaign for world domination…sorry…President of the United States.
Download and read online Seriously You Have to Eat in PDF and EPUB The 100% kid-friendly, G-rated version of the New York Times best-selling parents' book, You Have to F**king Eat.
Download and read online Rage Is Back in PDF and EPUB From the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Go the F*** to Sleep, “a rollicking, frenetic and hilarious jaunt” (San Francisco Chronicle) and an Amazon Best Book of the Month Raised in the shadow of two graffiti legends from New York’s “golden era” of subway bombing, Dondi Vance is less than thrilled to learn his father, Billy Rage, is back after sixteen years on the lam. But the transit cop who ruined Billy’s life and shattered his crew is running for mayor—and must be brought down. Welcome to the Great American Graffiti Novel. From the Trade Paperback edition.
Download and read online The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F ck in PDF and EPUB New York Times Bestseller In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people. For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.
Download and read online The Runaway Bunny in PDF and EPUB A little bunny keeps runningaway from his mother in an imaginative and imaginary game of verbal hide-and-seek; children will be profoundly comforted by this lovingly steadfast mother who finds her child every time. The Runaway Bunny, first published in 1942 and never out of print, has indeed become a classic. Generations of readers have fallen in love with the gentle magic of its reassuring words and loving pictures.
Download and read online It s Just a Plant in PDF and EPUB After a young girl sees her parents smoking marijuana one night, her mother answers her questions about the plant, its uses, and the laws that deal with it.
Download and read online I Will Not Go the F k to Sleep in PDF and EPUB What if a child, asked to go the f**k to sleep by its father, could respond in adult language? What if 5000 Indian yogis simultaneously dropped hot coffee on their laps in 5000 McDonalds to balance India's budget? How about selling used nukes to help balance the budget deficit? By the father of 3 boys and one Inner Brat that refuses to go to sleep or to grow up, this broad anthology of humor is his bestselling e-book. "Pythonesque," silly, and sophisticated at the same time, according to reviewers. I WILL NOT GO THE F**K TO SLEEP is an anytime book for adults who refuse to grow up or to go to sleep in this unreal and wacky world of jet-setting yogis, retired nukes, and presidents named Bush. Profane, compassionate, wickedly funny at times, it captures a world and a humor that is fresh, subversive, and often thought-provoking. You probably should not read it to your children under 15; but don’t be surprised if they decide to read it to you. "Hysterical and informative. For the rebel in you. Great style and humor"--Linda J. Lundy, 5-star review This edition restores the ORIGINAL cover which was so popular with readers.
Download and read online The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep in PDF and EPUB The groundbreaking No. 1 bestseller is sure to turn nightly bedtime battles into a loving and special end-of-day ritual. This child-tested, parent-approved story uses an innovative technique that brings a calm end to any child's day. Do you struggle with getting your child to fall asleep? Join parents all over the world who have embraced The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep as their new nightly routine. When Roger can't fall asleep, Mummy Rabbit takes him to see Uncle Yawn, who knows just what to do. Children will join Roger on his journey and be lulled to sleep alongside their new friend. Carl-Johan Forssén Ehrlin's simple story uses a unique and distinct language pattern that will help your child relax and fall asleep-at bedtime or naptime. Reclaim bedtime today! Praise for The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep: "Tired parents of planet earth - this is what you've been waiting for... If you don't already have a copy, you need to order one quick sharp" - Metro "The most peaceful bedtime we have had in months" - Daily Mail