Download and read online Bro Code for Parents in PDF and EPUB The newest book in the New York Times bestselling “Barney Stinson” canon teaches prospective parents everything they need to know to have a legendary kid. So you’re going to be a parent. You might be asking yourself a series of important questions: Will I be a good parent? • Will I be able to afford this? • Can I ever have sex again? Well, the answer to all these questions is a rock-solid no. But just because your existence is now a petrifying turd on the canvas of life doesn’t mean your kid has to be as lame as you’re about to become. That’s why I’ve written this book—to teach you how to be an awesomommy or legendaddy. The Bro Code for Parents will help you: Choose a baby name that won’t get your kid stuffed into a junior high locker • Interview and hire a smokin’ hot nanny • Teach your child instant classics like “The Boobs on the Bus” and “Bro, Bro, Bro Your Boat” With full-color illustrations, interactive work sheets, and even suggestions for how to turn a stroller into a broller, The Bro Code for Parents gives you all the tools you’ll need to raise your child to be almost as awesome as I am. Almost.
Download and read online Bro on the Go in PDF and EPUB THE BRO CODE provides men with all the rules they need to know in order to become a "bro" and behave properly among other bros. THE BRO CODE has never been published before. Few know of its existence, and the code, until now, has been verbally communicated between those in the 'bro'. Containing approximately 150 "unspoken" rules, this code of conduct ranges from the simple (bros before hos) to the complex (the hot-to-crazy ratio, complete with bar graphs and charts). With helpful sidebros THE BRO CODE will help any ordinary guy become the best bro he can be. Let ultimate bro and co-author Barney Stinson and his book, THE BRO CODE share their wisdom, lest you be caught making eye contact in a devil's three-way (two dudes, duh.) Sample Articles from THE BRO CODE: Article 1: Regardless of veracity, a Bro never admits familiarity with a Broadway show or musical. Article 53: A Bro will, whenever possible, provide his Bro with prophylactic protection.Article 57: A Bro may not speculate on the expected Bro / chick ratio of a party or venue without first disclosing the present-time observed ratio.
Download and read online The Bro Code in PDF and EPUB About the Author Barney Stinson is an awesome dude who lives in New York City and appears weekly on the hit CBS show How I Met Your Mother. Matt Kuhn is one of the coolest staff writers for How I Met Your Mother and helps write Barney’s Blog on the show’s website. He lives in Los Angeles, California. Everyone's life is governed by an internal code of conduct. Some call it morality. Others call it religion. But Bros in the know call this holy grail The Bro Code. Historically a spoken tradition passed from one generation to the next, the official code of conduct for Bros appears here in its published form for the first time ever. By upholding the tenets of this sacred and legendary document, any dude can learn to achieve Bro-dom.
Download and read online The Playbook in PDF and EPUB It. Is. On. From the pen of the prolific (and bestselling) author Barney Stinson comes the indispensable guide for every Bro looking to score with The Ladies. Featuring the famous plays including: -The Lorenzo Von Matterhorn -Mrs. Stinsfire -The Ted Mosby -The Time Traveller -The 'SNASA' -The Scuba Diver -The 'He's Not Coming' … and other greatest hits from Barney Stinson's secretPlaybookof legendary moves. So suit up and get ready to be schooled in awsomeness.
Download and read online Brocabulary in PDF and EPUB Bro-cab-u-lary (n.): A revolutionary new lexicon for bonding with your bros Put down your BlackBerry, you PDA-hole, and step into the testosterzone with Brocabulary. Wax fandiloquent about your favorite team or have a fargone-versation at the bar. Brocabulary leaves the vagibberish to the chicks and shows you how to: Define your stripping point (the precise number of Jäger shots it takes to make a woman want to get naked with you). Conceal a bangover after a night of excessive sex. Elect yourself the next Abraham Drinkin' and make an Inebriation Proclamation ("Four whores and seven beers ago . . ."). Stop brocrastinating! It's time to become everyone's guydol by leaving your mark on dudescussions for generations to come.
Download and read online How I Met Your Mother and Philosophy in PDF and EPUB Like philosophy itself, How I Met Your Mother has everyone thinking. How does a successful show that's been on the air for years suddenly become a hit in its fifth and sixth season? Have you ever wondered why you identify so strongly with Barney despite the fact that he’s such a douche? Or why your life story doesn’t make sense until you know the ending—or at least, the middle? Or where the Bro Code came from and why it’s so powerful? Or why you’d sooner miss the hottest date in your life than have to live in New Jersey? Of course you have, or if you haven’t, you’ll clearly remember from now on that you have. How I Met Your Mother and Philosophy answers all these questions and a whole lot more, including one or two that even you may not have thought of. Twenty of the awesome-est philosophers ever congregated in one bar have come together to quaff a few drinks—and to analyze this most awesomely philosophical of sit-coms. They poke, prod, and sniff at such momentous matters as the metaphysics of possimpible worlds, the misdeeds of Goliath National Bank, the ontology of waiting to get slapped, the epistemology of sexual attraction, why the Platinum Rule is to never love thy neighbor, the authenticity of censoring yourself, the ethics of doing bad things with partly good intentions, why future Ted’s opinions matter to present-day Ted, whether it’s irrational to wait for the Slutty Pumpkin, and why Canadians have that strange Canadian slant on things. This book shows that viewers of How I Met Your Mother and Philosophy know that philosophy is much more than a song and dance routine.
Download and read online Neil Patrick Harris Choose Your Own Autobiography in PDF and EPUB Tired of memoirs that only tell you what really happened? Sick of deeply personal accounts written in the first person? Seeking an exciting, interactive read that puts the “u” back in “aUtobiography”? Then look no further than Neil Patrick Harris: Choose Your Own Autobiography! In this revolutionary, Joycean experiment in light celebrity narrative, actor/personality/carbon-based-life-form Neil Patrick Harris lets you, the reader, live his life. You will be born to New Mexico. You will get your big break at an acting camp. You will get into a bizarre confrontation outside a nightclub with actor Scott Caan. Even better, at each critical juncture of your life you will choose how to proceed. You will decide whether to try out for Doogie Howser, M.D. You will decide whether to spend years struggling with your sexuality. You will decide what kind of caviar you want to eat on board Elton John’s yacht. Choose correctly and you’ll find fame, fortune, and true love. Choose incorrectly and you’ll find misery, heartbreak, and a hideous death by piranhas. All this, plus magic tricks, cocktail recipes, embarrassing pictures from your time as a child actor, and even a closing song. Yes, if you buy one book this year, congratulations on being above the American average, and make that book Neil Patrick Harris: Choose Your Own Autobiography!
Download and read online Dude Bro in PDF and EPUB Dude, Bro: How to College is a humorous guide to surviving college written by comedian Bread Foster. Dude, Bro will provide articles, episodes, and truth (under the guise of guidance) about college life, mixed with honest stories from a mildly psychotic student. After extensive discussions with fellow college students who were part of his college experience, the most frequently uttered phrase is “how did we survive that?” and Bread wants to teach future bros how. Dude, Bro will allow the reader to get a moral out of a story where morals are neither black nor white. The objective is to provide an honest experience from a lower-middle class author who went crazy at a state university. Dude, Bro will have a sense of humor because college itself is kind of a joke.
Download and read online Welcome to the Club in PDF and EPUB From the comedian behind the popular parenting blog The Ugly Volvo comes a refreshing spin on the baby milestone book. Instead of a place to lovingly capture the first time baby sleeps through the night, this book shows what it's like the first time baby rolls off the bed/sofa/changing table, leaving mom or dad in a state of pure terror (it happens). These 100 rarely documented but all-too-realistic milestones—such as "First Time Baby Says a Word You Didn't Want Her to Say"—provide comfort, solidarity, and comic relief for new parents. Laugh-out-loud relatable text and distinctive illustrations of these "bad" parenting moments make this a must-have book for anyone entering the mysterious club of parenthood.
Download and read online Rules in PDF and EPUB This 2007 Newbery Honor Book is a humorous and heartwarming debut about feeling different and finding acceptance. Now in After Words paperback! Twelve-year-old Catherine just wants a normal life. Which is near impossible when you have a brother with autism and a family that revolves around his disability. She's spent years trying to teach David the rules from "a peach is not a funny-looking apple" to "keep your pants on in public"---in order to head off David's embarrassing behaviors. But the summer Catherine meets Jason, a surprising, new sort-of friend, and Kristi, the next-door friend she's always wished for, it's her own shocking behavior that turns everything upside down and forces her to ask: What is normal?
Download and read online Code of the Street Decency Violence and the Moral Life of the Inner City in PDF and EPUB Unsparing and important. . . . An informative, clearheaded and sobering book.—Jonathan Yardley, Washington Post (1999 Critic's Choice) Inner-city black America is often stereotyped as a place of random violence, but in fact, violence in the inner city is regulated through an informal but well-known code of the street. This unwritten set of rules—based largely on an individual's ability to command respect—is a powerful and pervasive form of etiquette, governing the way in which people learn to negotiate public spaces. Elijah Anderson's incisive book delineates the code and examines it as a response to the lack of jobs that pay a living wage, to the stigma of race, to rampant drug use, to alienation and lack of hope.
Download and read online Say No to the Bro in PDF and EPUB The hijinks of Miss Congeniality meet the high school gender politics of The List in Kat Helgeson’s timely contemporary novel about two teens who become entangled in a cut-throat prom date auction. Ava’s plan for surviving senior year at her new school is simple: fly under the radar until graduation. No boys. No attachments. No drama. But all that goes out the window when she gets drafted into the Prom Bowl—a long-standing tradition where senior girls compete in challenges and are auctioned off as prom dates to the highest bidder. Ava joins forces with star quarterback Mark Palmer to try and get herself out of the competition, but their best laid schemes lead to self-sabotage more than anything else. And to make matters worse, they both begin to realize that the Prom Bowl isn’t all fun and games. When one event spirals dangerously out of control, Ava and Mark must decide whether shutting down the Prom Bowl once and for all is worth the price of sacrificing their futures.
Download and read online Reasons Mommy Drinks in PDF and EPUB Based on the popular blog, an uproarious collection of essays on the struggles of new motherhood is complemented by cocktail recipes and shares the stories of two award-winning businesswomen who bonded over their love for their babies and mutual bewilderment at the myriad ways their lives were upended. Original.
Download and read online Took in PDF and EPUB “Folks say Old Auntie takes a girl and keeps her fifty years—then lets her go and takes another one.” Thirteen-year-old Daniel Anderson doesn’t believe Brody Mason’s crazy stories about the ghost witch who lives up on Brewster’s Hill with Bloody Bones, her man-eating razorback hog. He figures Brody’s probably just trying to scare him since he’s the new kid . . . a “stuck-up snot” from Connecticut. But Daniel’s seven-year-old sister Erica has become more and more withdrawn, talking to her lookalike doll. When she disappears into the woods one day, he knows something is terribly wrong. Did the witch strike? Has Erica been “took”?
Download and read online This Book Loves You in PDF and EPUB This book is cleverer and better looking than you. This book will blow your mind. This book loves you. This Book Loves You is a collection of beautifully illustrated inspirational sayings by which you should live your life. If you follow each and every one, your life will become easier, more fabulous, more rewarding. Imagine what a chilled-out and wonderful human being people would think you were if you lived by the simple principle: 'You can never fail if you never try.' Your wasted life would be an inspiration to others. Think of all the pointless, unhappy striving you could simply give up. Throw away that guitar! Give up on your dreams! Embrace your astounding mediocrity. This Book Loves You has something for everyone - or at least everyone willing to give up and stop caring. If all else fails, remember: 'Don't be yourself. Be a pizza. Everyone loves pizza.' PewDiePie was sent to planet Earth to dispense wisdom, teach us common sense and instruct us in the ancient art of Inspirology. PewDiePie just wants to make you happy. PewDiePie loves you even more than this book does - isn't that enough for you?